i think i understand why people run marathons
hey everyone -
i haven't posted in a while because:
1) i have been out of it
2) i had a biiig weekend full of 20-mile-hilly-terrained-it's-almost-nighttime-we-need-water-NOW-crap!-where's-a-river-where's-a-river weekend and
3) i don't want to look at a computer when i get home from work
i sound like i'm whining, but i'm having a really hard time adjusting to a 9-5 lifestyle. this is the first time since high school i've had to get up and get home everyday at the same time, and it's really hard for me. much harder than i thought it would be. i'm getting panicky all the time - which makes NO sense - because all worries and concerns about getting a job, finding a field i enjoy, paying rent and buying food are outta the picture.
landing this job solved / placed on hold a bunch of huge goals i had: a) debating about going back to school, b) wondering if i want to study architecture, c) finding a part-time job to pay rent, d) finding a REAL job...
and *poof* just like that. all gone.
i'm not complaing at ALL, but i'm realizing that i'm actually goal-less right now. all my goals were accomplished overnight.
so i'm thinking that one of the only ways out of this funk i'm in is to create some brand new, big, fun goals. finishing 2 oil paintings by january. lifting weights every other day to get some freaking tone in my floppy-flop arms. biking twice a week to/fro work. working on writing to enter into a magazine. taking more intensive yoga classes. learning how to play an instrument, say, a washboard? a harmonica? i gotta start with the basics.
* * *
but all in all, things are ok - everything is... well... a bit too easy. so i've decided to add some good ol'fashioned challenges into my life.
* * *
a great part about today: i was able to talk with both of my grandma and grandpa, who i love deeeearly. my grandma's birthday was yesterday (HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!) and my grandpa is in the hospital post knee surgery, but seems to be doign well. they both offered super great advice, and listen to me ramble and understand why i'm having a hard time and it makes me feel like i'm not so alone in dealing with stuff. i love and miss them so much.
as i do yyyyyou.
* * *
oh! and i get to see centro-matic and david dondero tonight with ruderto. i shall bask in the joy of the sounds and south-by nostalgia.
* * *
hope all is well, kids. i miss you a lot... jen.
i haven't posted in a while because:
1) i have been out of it
2) i had a biiig weekend full of 20-mile-hilly-terrained-it's-almost-nighttime-we-need-water-NOW-crap!-where's-a-river-where's-a-river weekend and
3) i don't want to look at a computer when i get home from work
i sound like i'm whining, but i'm having a really hard time adjusting to a 9-5 lifestyle. this is the first time since high school i've had to get up and get home everyday at the same time, and it's really hard for me. much harder than i thought it would be. i'm getting panicky all the time - which makes NO sense - because all worries and concerns about getting a job, finding a field i enjoy, paying rent and buying food are outta the picture.
landing this job solved / placed on hold a bunch of huge goals i had: a) debating about going back to school, b) wondering if i want to study architecture, c) finding a part-time job to pay rent, d) finding a REAL job...
and *poof* just like that. all gone.
i'm not complaing at ALL, but i'm realizing that i'm actually goal-less right now. all my goals were accomplished overnight.
so i'm thinking that one of the only ways out of this funk i'm in is to create some brand new, big, fun goals. finishing 2 oil paintings by january. lifting weights every other day to get some freaking tone in my floppy-flop arms. biking twice a week to/fro work. working on writing to enter into a magazine. taking more intensive yoga classes. learning how to play an instrument, say, a washboard? a harmonica? i gotta start with the basics.
* * *
but all in all, things are ok - everything is... well... a bit too easy. so i've decided to add some good ol'fashioned challenges into my life.
* * *
a great part about today: i was able to talk with both of my grandma and grandpa, who i love deeeearly. my grandma's birthday was yesterday (HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!) and my grandpa is in the hospital post knee surgery, but seems to be doign well. they both offered super great advice, and listen to me ramble and understand why i'm having a hard time and it makes me feel like i'm not so alone in dealing with stuff. i love and miss them so much.
as i do yyyyyou.
* * *
oh! and i get to see centro-matic and david dondero tonight with ruderto. i shall bask in the joy of the sounds and south-by nostalgia.
* * *
hope all is well, kids. i miss you a lot... jen.
posted by jasembera at
3:09 PM
2 Comments:
oh god i miss you.
letter shall be written soon. many many stories to tell. but lately i'm using most of my spare time on last-minute residency app things.
lets talk on the phone again. you're pretty much the only person on the planet i can tolerate and/or love being on the phone with more than 4 minutes.
By
Diane, at 5:16 PM
Thank god. reading your words is like reading salvation....or something like that.
i am jealous of your weekend adventures, once again glad i have you to live vicariously through. i am glad you have a job, now you can become thoroughly accomplished in the washboard, but have you thought about the xylophone? also, i will send you the pic of your painting as soon as i get my comp up and running - ive had problems!
later luv.
By
Anonymous, at 5:17 AM
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